The Power of Resilience: Jill Collins on Life, Loss, and Leadership

What if, after experiencing a heart-wrenching loss, you found the strength to rise from those ashes and live your life to the fullest? This is the powerful journey that our guest, Jill Collins, shares with us. An inspirational speaker, author, and personal rejuvenation expert, Jill bravely opens up about her journey of empowerment following the sudden death of her husband. We explore her signature program, the Effect Framework for Connection, her upcoming book, and her YouTube channel where she offers practical tips on navigating life transitions with grace and resilience.

Jill’s story is not just about overcoming loss, but also about conquering self-doubt and procrastination. We delve into the power of self-discipline, the importance of commitment, and the art of self-leadership. As we discuss Jill's path of personal growth, we touch on the significance of developing customized routines, finding mentors, and celebrating small victories. Our chat reveals a wealth of practical advice on bouncing back from failure and facing life’s challenges both in personal life and business.

In the latter part of our conversation, we shift gears and explore my vision of global unity starting with Argentina. We talk about the importance of spreading love, compassion, and solidarity across borders and political lines. At the heart of it, this episode is a hearty discussion on personal growth, resilience, and creating impactful changes in our world. Tune in, and be inspired to rise from your own ashes and live life to its fullest potential.

Colorado’s best business coach, Baz Porter, has a new mindset strategy mentoring service to help you unlock new heights of growth, prosperity, happiness, and success. Book your first meeting with the coaching visionary at https://www.ramsbybaz.com/

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:02

Hi and welcome to another episode of my podcast, rice and the Ashes. For those people who don't know what this is about, this is all about you and empowering you, telling your story, how you ended up where you were, the challenges you overcame, hence why Rice and the Ashes are a bit like a phoenix. You've all had that experience. My next guest in this episode has Her name is Jill Collins.

Speaker 1: 0:31

She's an inspirational speaker, aspirational author. She's a life coach, a personal rejuvenation and, through the empowerment of connection, after facing a sudden loss of her husband, over the 14 years, jill embarked on a journey of self-discovery. It led her to rediscovering her purpose Interesting others, connecting with them to all sorts of resources, experiences and communities they needed to thrive. So Jill launched a connections-centered program, her signature program. I'm going to get this wrong because I'm dyslexic. As I said, effect framework for connection. That brought her upcoming book, the power of connection revitalizing yourself after loss. Her YouTube channel the links will be below in this. I highly recommend you check her out. Teach is the practical tips of overcoming life transitions in living your life summits. I'm going to let her explain who she is because I make a complete hash out of reading anything due to my dyslexia. Please welcome, jill Collins. It's a pleasure to have you here.

Speaker 2: 1:53

Thank you, it's so nice to be here and thank you for having me here with your audience today, so excited. Thank you.

Speaker 1: 2:00

How did you end up doing what you're doing today? I know you mentioned in the beginning that you lost your husband.

Speaker 2: 2:07

Yes, seven years ago. Most it was a sudden. It was very sudden. We had no clue it was going to happen. He wasn't ill for any period of time. He was actually quite fit and healthy. He was actually running and collapsed and died of a massive heart attack and died in an instant. So after 14 years, it's a big change. We spent every day together and we were really interdependent and very close. We were each other's best friends. So it was a life change in a second.

Speaker 2: 2:42

As I say, everyone grieves differently and for me, I just got into administrator mode instantly. It was just what do we have to get done? What has to happen? I just didn't allow myself to feel it. I think we don't know how someone is going to react to any major change or loss. This podcast rise from the ashes. We don't know how we're going to handle something and how we're going to rise. I don't think we can possibly judge anyone who is going through something that we maybe haven't experienced, even if we've experienced it. We can't judge because we don't know how the makeup of our body, of individual people's bodies, are, how they handle stress, how they handle things like that and how their nervous system reacts. I did it in such a way where I think I was initially. I wasn't ignoring it, but I just had to get through it.

Speaker 1: 3:36

What was the main? Obviously, the focus of the challenge changes as the journey continues. When this first incident happened, how did you do, how did you show yourself self-care throughout this?

Speaker 2: 3:51

I get what you're saying. I think for me, how I initially did it because it was seven years ago, like I said, it was 14 years is I did what I knew how to do in those moments of major crisis. I've noticed the Reinvention Queen for many experiences in my life where I've had to reinvent myself, either voluntarily or involuntarily. That moment it was how do I cope? I can look back now and see how obvious it was. But at the time everyone said just stay busy. For me, it was maintaining the exact same schedule I had. We had a trip planned 10 days later back to our second home in Argentina. I just picked up and said I got to go. That's what we do. That's what we're doing. Then I drank heavily more than I usually did. I was just socializing with people. Friends down there were just keeping me busy. We were out every night. We were going for lunch. We were having bottled champagne at lunch or two. Then at the end of the day, what really scared me and terrified me was those moments on my calendar where I had nothing. If I had a Friday afternoon or Friday evening with nothing on it, it was a panic moment. It was scary. I had to just not be with myself for a second. Basically, it was involving, at the end of the day, going to bed and just passing out, didn't have to worry about it with alcohol, I think.

Speaker 2: 5:08

Over time I realized it really wasn't sustainable. I was trying to start a business. I had a business idea where I created a matchmaking service down in Argentina. Basically, no one was doing that. They were using the apps but I thought this is a great idea. I started dating again. I was like these apps are crazy. Let me start a matchmaking service.

Speaker 2: 5:29

I was functioning, but I knew enough that with the way I was drinking and socializing, that I couldn't book meetings in the morning because I was still a little rough in the morning. I wasn't feeling great. My whole life was circled around that or centered around that. I think it was probably a year or a year and a half after that I started thinking Jill, if you stop drinking, this would be a real game changer. I had a life coach or two and it took me about. I'd say let's see, I stopped drinking four years ago. Next month will be four years.

Speaker 2: 6:06

Thank you, it was the best decision I could have ever made in my life, the best. I'm around it all the time. I have it in my home down there and I'm around people who drink, it doesn't even bother me, because it really changed my identity. We can go into that in a minute. But really what focused for me was I realized that I couldn't continue to up level and to get better as long as this particular like I was self-medicating. Whatever your self-medicating decision is, whatever it is you're choosing it could be Netflix, it could be food, it could be sex, it could be drinking drugs. Whatever it is, it limits us. It limits our ability to really move forward. Thank you, I'd say. In the past four years, that's when I had. Initially, it's like, you know, when you're not drinking, it's like now you got to feel.

Speaker 1: 6:53

You got to feel everything.

Speaker 2: 6:54

You get to feel the good and the bad, and I think that's when my real grieving process started. And it's still a journey. You know, it's still a journey. I always say I'm pretty much out of vices now. You know, netflix doesn't even do it for me anymore, so it's like I got a. You know, meditation is like okay, you know, I have to try things now to really to really get centered, because when I'm off, it's like there's nothing to go and run to anymore, and that is. That is, honestly, that's a scary place, but that is the best place to be, because that's when we have to seriously for me, I have to go inside and say okay, joe, you have to face the music. What's up? You know, what do you got? What do you got to fix inside? It's not in anybody else, it's on you.

Speaker 1: 7:31

I find in what you've just described is a lot of people's procrastination within fear and shame Because of the shame. With alcohol I can rush that I was drinking for years, kill, nearly kill myself for it, etc. But there comes a point and I love what you said where you can't run from it, where you have to decide and make a cognitive choice to face the pain in order for you to step out of the grief and that cycle of it and go. Well, I can grow. I'm allowing myself to grow and giving yourself permission to do that. What was the most prominent moment for you in that change of going where you were with your drinking and partying and burying yourself from reality, which is essentially what it was? Yeah, pivotal moment when you pivot and went oh my God.

Speaker 2: 8:29

now, Now is time. Yeah, I don't know if I had it was accumulation of events and things that happened. I didn't have, like you know, a major accident or I didn't get stopped, I didn't do it, you know, or anything like that, although I know those rock bottom moments a lot of people, we've had those and and I've had them in other play situations, whether it be relationships and things like that personal relationships but in this case, I would say it's just a build up and, really honestly, mine was. I knew I was, I needed to do it for a long time, like I was 10, started attending a Tony Rob, toby Robbins events. I even got coaching certification to help my clients and my matchmaking service and I just said, jill, your just, your life is not. This is not matching your blueprint of who you are anymore, and so like who you're becoming is like you got this thing going on. It doesn't fit and kind of like living a little bit of a lie. Maybe is how it felt.

Speaker 2: 9:16

And at one point my girlfriend said to me. She said you know, I really like me to stop drinking before I go back to the US, so would you stop drinking with me? And she didn't want to be alone. Because we were going to parties and, like you know, we had gala's, things we were going to every night of the week, and because I'm as a few in one night and I said, yeah, I'll do it with you. And it was just so casual and I was so ready because I was really going downhill, spiraling downhill, and and I and I stopped and we both did it together and I would say, probably a month before that, the one that really got me that's a little bit embarrassing, but it's true is my brother had had is in recovery and he had stopped drinking and I was at home in Atlanta visiting my family and I was at if I went to my class reunion for the first time 30 years and and I got home and I was with a couple other friends and we've been drinking a lot and I got home and back to my parents house and I went to get ice out of the refrigerator and I dropped some ice on the floor and I was so drunk that I reached down to get it and I lost my balance and I literally just fell on my face and my nose started like bleeding and he said I broke your nose.

Speaker 2: 10:23

I'm like I don't think I did, but I still have like a little mark right here from a reminder, you know, and?

Speaker 2: 10:28

and my brother was sober. And here's my brother coming in to help me the one who I've been always helping him and on him to try to stop drinking and stop using right. And here's here, I'm like setting a terrible example and I just realized I said you know, that's really shitty, joe. I didn't think about it at the time, but it's that deep seated feeling of like shame that you'd be buried, and it's that part of for me. What I've noticed about myself is when I can't show up for myself, I can't and I can't trust myself and I'm not honoring my own commitments to myself. It's the things that I was doing, when no one was looking or not doing, that really eat away at us. And that's when we went for me, when I can't say we but for, I'll speak for myself.

Speaker 2: 11:05

But when I realized that or I felt insecure, my self esteem and my confidence was so low because it was, it was all about that. It was. It wasn't how I showed up for other people, it was what I wasn't, how I wasn't showing up for me. And when I realized, oh, the secret to this confidence thing and not feeling like like a, like a you know people talk about imposter syndrome and all these things and self sabotage. It's the key to that. The secret is showing up for ourselves. Because when we do that and we actually say you know what, I'm going to go to the gym in the morning at nine o'clock and when you actually do it, hey, you can trust yourself. Okay, there's one, I can trust myself, and then we can do bigger things. So that's, that was the key that I got out of. That was just doing what I say I'm going to do when no one's looking.

Speaker 1: 11:49

I love that distinction about you taking one step at a time and rewarding yourself for it. A lot of people maybe going to the journey sobriety. They're trying to get things. They're trying to do things in massive chunks.

Speaker 2: 12:04

Yes.

Speaker 1: 12:05

Please stop yes.

Speaker 2: 12:07

Thank you for saying that.

Speaker 1: 12:08

You will, you will, you know it was necessary will fail, but you'll fall. At first hurdle we met, through Tony Robbins and the plan and partnership organization, the peer group there, which is fantastic. One of the things Tony speaks about in his seminars and UPW and many, many others is chunking things down to manageable bite size pieces and people don't know how to do that. Which brings me to my next question about the routines that you acquired in your morning routines or rituals that you can do automatically in our habit now, but when you first started, they were challenging what you are through. Some of them routines, maybe to inspire people who are at this stage now going what the hell I'm going to do? I've got all this mountain decline.

Speaker 2: 15:51

I love that you said that is, don't try to do it all. You know, there's someone very close to me right now who has stopped drinking recently and they want to do so much all at once and there's a lot of beatings. You know self, you know judgment and criticism. Like I just need to get this going and I need to get that going and I need to do all these things and we have to take a moment to. I'm going to go to the thing about routines, but this is. I want to just touch on that real quick. Is that we need to celebrate that win, that? Wow, you stop drinking. Holy shit, that's huge. Can I cuss yeah?

Speaker 2: 16:23

it's like you know, it's like, that's huge. Do you understand that? That is a single most thing, the most important thing that you have done for yourself, yeah, are none. If you go to the gym today or not, who cares? That was like what. It's huge so.

Speaker 2: 16:39

I'll break that you know, like take a moment and you get to the. As I talk about reaching the summit, you know I reach the top like be your best. And the summit doesn't mean like I've done all my shit and now I'm at the top. Okay, I got it all done. My checklist, my to do list, is empty and who I've arrived? No, it's that I got that. I stopped drinking today or I didn't drink today, and that's at the summit. And you got to take a minute and stay on the top of that summit and look around and go looks pretty good up here, nice job, and really mean it and really feel good about it, because I'm guilty of. Most people is. I'll just say, okay, that was cool, what's next? What are you gonna do? You?

Speaker 2: 17:13

know, and I don't. I don't do this all the time, but I mean I can tell you, when we do, we're gonna, we're gonna those things are gonna be much more satisfying and it's easier to take that next step tomorrow. So that's one thing. What do I do with my daily routine? It's not what most people do. I'm gonna, I'm gonna challenge or I'm gonna probably piss off a lot of people. I don't have one.

Speaker 2: 17:35

I don't have a daily routine. I tried all that for a long time. I was very disciplined in the beginning, even during my early day stages, because my my late husband and I were very we had we had a lot of like. We're very disciplined. We had certain things we did. We got up, we did these things, and so initially I was really organized, very focused, and then I slowly lost those habits and then I had to gain them back and then I went overboard. I'm like, okay, I got a prime every day. I got him. You know. You know, do all these things, jim. You know, read my incantations, whatever all these things are that everyone says, and there are plenty of videos. I'm sure you have other people that you've had a guest that will give you an incredible routine that you can take on.

Speaker 2: 18:10

For me, I spent so much time beating myself up for out of the five things that I had if I didn't do two of them, and so I said, fuck it, I'm not doing this anymore, what I'm gonna, what I realized, and I finally gotten comfortable enough with myself and saying, hey, jill, you know what? I should not work for you. Maybe it doesn't, maybe it will someday, but why don't we just try this. You know that in the morning I'm I talk to myself is you know in the morning that you just move slow. You like to have your coffee, you like to sit in your chair, you like to catch up with friends. You want to, you want to have that connection with people.

Speaker 2: 18:45

You might get on your mat and stretch, you might go for a swim, you might go to the gym. You might not be kind to yourself. That's what me talking to myself is just say this is my time and whatever fills in with that. Be okay with that. And then it released me to not to like be okay when I'm just wanting to sit around and not do much. And then I go. Okay, you know what. Alright, so what if we started incorporating one thing here? Maybe we should, maybe we should try to go to the pool. Let's go to us, just jump in the swimming pool for a little bit every morning or just don't even make it every morning, just try it today.

Speaker 2: 19:13

Do it today.

Speaker 2: 19:15

And I did that last week. I was like, oh, that's pretty nice, I really like that. Oh, that's cool, no pressure. Like it's on my calendar, at eight o'clock in the morning I'm going to swim for 30 minutes every day and then I'm going to meditate and you know, it's like somebody like me is going like the internal. Like fuck you person goes Fuck you, I'm not doing that, you can't make me do that. And so I go Okay, be kind. Hey, how does that feel? That's pretty good one. I'm gonna do that tomorrow. So it's like talking to like a little girl for me is like hey, that was fun, do you want to do that again tomorrow? Yeah, let's do it tomorrow.

Speaker 2: 19:40

That's that's how I motivate myself and I've learned tricks. And the keys for me is if I start off in the morning and I'm telling myself yeah, you know, even sitting there for two hours now, what are you going to do? You messed up the day already. Good job, that's the old me. And then I wouldn't do anything. And if I did do it, I felt like I was living on borrowed time. I'd have to catch up because I lost time.

Speaker 2: 19:59

And I live in a moment, in a life of stress and survival and struggle, and it didn't work for me.

Speaker 1: 20:05

I love that and that's a huge distinction. So many people do what they've, that they. They follow things because someone else said them, or it's the buzzword or the end thing to do, what self leadership is about. Self leadership is exactly what you've just described yes, being fuck off to the norm and doing what's said to you in your algorithm great and then adapting to it. Yes, but people are so and I'm going to get shot down for this and that's fine. I don't care. Send me an email, that's fine. You've got to understand what works for you may not work for somebody else, and also vice versa. Yeah, but it's a journey in wood to understand that and have an inner standing of who you are not understanding, but an inner standing and inner standing.

Speaker 1: 21:04

I love that it's a completely different concept of I'll be like everybody else. I'll do my meditation, I'm gonna do the lemon water, I'm gonna go out for 45 minutes walking, then gonna go to the gym and then I'm gonna start work. That may work for some entrepreneur who's 20 years old just starting out. For somebody who is 30 and plus isn't going to work because we know better. We have different bodily functions and different bodily needs. Some of the people we we know in our, our networks, we know the same people, but who can you identify as one of the five most influential people? Not just they don't have to be famous, but who's really inspired who you are and driven you to the results that you have today in the success.

Speaker 2: 21:56

On the outside of the Platinum community or in both. I would say this is kind of funny. My background in politics and I don't watch the news today, by the way so I'm not active in politics, I don't have an opinion or the other. I'm apolitical at the moment, but I absolutely love the show, madam Secretary, with Taya Leone, and if I could ever interview her, if you're ever watching, can I call you um? I? I think her character in that series is so masterful, she's so brilliant, she's so, she's so intentional, she's feminine, but yet she's a leader and I could watch that show every night and sometimes I do and replays. I'm like a binge watcher with that um, if I do anything, and I because it just it gives me this like feeling of what leadership as a woman should be like and how we can really make change in the world, and we don't have to be Secretary of State to do it. But I'd love to be that someday. Or Ambassador to Argentina those are two of my dreams.

Speaker 2: 22:54

Is um? Is that to just lead with such integrity and to be willing to speak and to and to say what you believe without fear, without being what we say, committed to the outcome? Don't be committed to the outcome is that we look at the impact it could make. If I say this, what's it going to mean to me with the people that are hearing it? Are they going to reject me? Are they going to say, oh, you're terrible, or am I going to lose friends? Whatever it could mean, right, could I lose my job?

Speaker 2: 23:26

Is that's that power of integrity is saying, no matter what I'm going to say, and I'm going to do what I need, what I think is right and that's what I saw in her and that character. I'd say others would be, um, you know, I'd say with my youtube channel and it's pretty high reach, but I'd say Oprah really inspires me and I used to not think that, but I can see now. What I love about her and the way that she interviewed is that it was always coming from a point of curiosity, not like I'm only bringing people on my, on my stage that are have my opinions or my point of view. I love finding out what makes people tick and and how they did what they did. But it's also when I, before I start any interview, I always say who, who can I speak on behalf of?

Speaker 2: 24:08

who is the person that needs to hear from this person right now and how can I ask the right questions that they're going to be able to be helped and be served, and so I'm thinking of someone whenever, or a group of people every time before I interview. And that's I think that's what she did a lot of is she brought the best out in people that you, that most people, and ask questions that most people may not ask her be afraid to ask. So I love her and I'd say others would just be within our plaque community. I mean there's so many um you know, I'd say Lisa and Yardley, lisa Libra and Yardley Wang, peter Swain, so many people in my YBL, my your best life group, that are comprised of a lot of um platinum partners.

Speaker 2: 24:45

I mean Tony, of course, tony Robbins. I mean it wasn't for Tony, I would not be who I am today and just the being in that community. There's so many I'm going to forget people, but um, there are people like um, even Dr Joe to spend, dr Joe to spend in his work lately. Um, I'm a real fan of Dr Gabor Matte and just I think there's just people that are really making change, that are that are really out there, um, putting themselves out there like you have as well, in spite of what people think or say, you're having the courage to do that and to say I'm gonna.

Speaker 1: 25:15

I'm gonna speak my my truth and I'm gonna help others, even if I get gets you know, you know mud slung at me and tomatoes at me, so I appreciate that very much thank you and I appreciate you being here and also you know saying that it means a lot to me. But my, my, my thing is it's never about me. I never did this for money, fame, recognition. I did this, all of what I do, to give a second chance to humanity, because it people say that there are there in it, for you know the self, the, the impact, etc.

Speaker 1: 25:58

There are very, very few people in the world that can genuinely say I don't care about the money, I do it anyway there are a few, but there are few and far between.

Speaker 1: 26:12

I would like to say I'm one of them people because I've been broke and I've been. I've had a bit of money. Now I've not been super rich, but I know the both sides of things and I know where I was most happiest, and that wasn't being completely broke, being completely rich. Every time I was happy, it was doing what I love doing best, and that's things like this helping people, giving people a voice yeah, and it's the impact that I feel that you have. That is necessary and also needs to be heard, because I know you have a podcast. You do a lot for other people, but people don't do enough, I believe, for you.

Speaker 2: 27:00

Thank you. Well, it's probably true, but at the same time, um, yeah, I'm probably not a good receiver. That's something I'm always working on is asking, learning to ask for help. I think that's something that we there's a lot of times that comes from our self-esteem too are going through the process of am I worthy to ask, are people going to? What's the impact? And so that's my lesson for sure.

Speaker 1: 27:23

Right now, I was about to go into that actually, yeah, because a lot of the listeners I get asked a lot are aspiring. They're aspiring leaders and they want to go to next level. Who has? How have you received or what was the person you received the most impactful lesson from, and how did that journey accumulate? What did it origin? What was the origins for it?

Speaker 2: 27:53

You, said you like?

Speaker 1: 27:54

difficult questions.

Speaker 2: 27:56

Yeah, I do I'm thinking of. There's so many, so many. I can go back to my late 20s when I just moved to a new city and I didn't know anyone and I found someone that I really admired and I had the courage to call her and ask her for lunch and it scared the crap out of me and she ended up transforming and basically gave me so much help and mentored me and my career, my whole career, and where I came out of that was so much and it was so much because of her and then others. And then I think what here's what I got out of. That is, when you do it once, I always say find, have the courage to ask someone to help you who scares you just a little bit. Yeah, Reach high.

Speaker 2: 28:40

And I talk about the 33% rule and that there's this mid 33% and that's the status quo. That's the people that we generally associate with on a regular basis. It could be family, friends, co-workers, people that we don't necessarily can't really change that much, but change who we socialize with in that category, but they're there. And then there's another 33% of them of our social circle that are in the bottom 33 and there's people that are probably behind us in their journey, their growth, and maybe we can help them or they could also drag us down. So we have to be mindful, but we don't want to spend too much time down there either.

Speaker 2: 29:12

Then there's that top 33%, and that's the place that I like to play in is how can I find people in that top 33%? And as we grow and we elevate and we change and we learn more and everything, we will find that sometimes that top 33% some will move to the middle and then we have to keep finding more, and so I'm always thinking how can I? Who do I need to know? How can I find the people? They're generally people that are doing what we want to do. They've already achieved what we want to achieve and they will hold us accountable. They won't just tell us what we want to hear. They're people. That it's what Les Brown says if you're the smartest person in the room, you're in the wrong room.

Speaker 2: 29:54

This is these are people that you're trying to get in that new room and you're like you're kind of walking, you're like I don't know if I even belong here, kind of it's a little scary, and that's where we want to be. That's getting out of your comfort zone and that's where we grow the most and, as a connector, that is the space that I'm always trying to encourage people to find that circle, find your tribe and get in there, and then you help others along the way. And so for me I would say it was real law in Tampa. I was the president of University of South Florida and then I'd say probably you know people, someone else who changed my life tremendously, my late husband for sure. We grew so much together. We did so many amazing things together. Jeb Bush appointed me to a several board, so at the time when I was in that space of politics, he was influential.

Speaker 2: 30:43

Today, people like Preston Brown and who, we started a business together. We went through a lot of things. Peter Swain, once again. Jeremy Newsom, jeremy oh my gosh, here we go. That's one. I actually never thought of them, jeremy Newsom and Spetlana Newsom. They're actually my very first interview I did on my YouTube channel and they're an amazing couple and they're up to just some beautiful things. So I would say in the past year or two the two of them have had the most influence and impact on my life, for sure.

Speaker 1: 31:12

And they will get a recognition here and I will start telling people and write, because I'll.

Speaker 2: 31:17

Yeah, they're amazing. You have to get to know them, they're great.

Speaker 1: 31:20

I would be honest to do so. Yeah and your journey through your transformation. Has there been any books or podcast you've listened to that you can recommend for people in the interim before they get that courage to go and step into that room where they feel very, very uncomfortable?

Speaker 2: 31:41

Absolutely yes, because I think sometimes, especially coaches I remember my very first coach after Ed died, and I love her up to pieces, but she said, okay, first day we're gonna you know, five years from now, day in the life of Jill write it and I'm like, are you freaking, kidding me? I don't even feel, I don't even feel like doing the laundry today. I don't even know what I'm gonna be doing eating for dinner, and it was too much. So I agree with you it's like before we walk, we have to learn to crawl, and so I think sometimes it's like getting into an event. We need to, as coaches or as people that are friends and we're helping others mentors is to be mindful of that. We don't want to give them whole solid foods when they're still learning how to eat and they're coming off the bottle and they need, you know, soft foods.

Speaker 2: 32:22

So it's, how do you start with that? And for me it's. I would say I won't mention specifically, necessarily, but YouTube channel, the YouTube YouTube in general. Thank God for people who have the courage like you, like me, finally, it's taken me three years to get the courage to do this. I know it's three years. And is that to? Who are giving content away and they're putting real value out there? I mean people like Evan Carmichael and Tom Bylo and Lewis Howes, ed Milet, mel Robbins. There's so much free content out there and things that we can do and we just have to find you know, abraham Hicks, people that are that are gonna Dr Joe dispenses, the people out there who are doing things that you can get for free. Just fine. When you start finding one, thank God, people don't like algorithms, but in the same time, they're really good because you start finding one thing that resonates with you and you're gonna get some suggestions below that, and so just gotta find some. Listen to a few, see what's going on. If you're more of a watcher and you like videos, that's one way.

Speaker 2: 33:22

Books are another option. I absolutely love to go very basic. I think the first thing that I could really digest, if you will, was when my second coach helped me. She turned me on to a few things I wasn't ready for, and then what resonated with me right away was Mel Robbins, the five second rule. I'm like, oh, I can do that, that makes sense. I got that. So you know, finding books like that the five second rule, if you get more advanced and you're doing more, I would say some of my favorite books are like the Big Leap by Dr Gay Hendricks. This is more advanced, but the untethered soul. You know, michael Singer, I have a lot of them. I have to go back I think I have it in my page somewhere of my books that I recommend, but there are just some that I just go back and read over and over again. I'm a relationships coach too, so I'm always into things like that. I love things like Esther Perrell and.

Speaker 2: 34:13

But yeah, I'm always reading or audios. I do a lot of audio books. Now I don't read as much because I have ADD, so I can't just sit and do one thing. You know, I'm usually like reading, playing a game on my phone while I'm reading, while I'm drinking something you know it's like and I know that's. People say you need to slow down. I get it, I know. So you can put it in the comments below, send me an email and tell me about it. I know that already. So, yeah, you can harp on me, but I'm aware of it. But it's like I love that doing something and having something feeding my mind at the same time. So, yeah, Abraham Hicks, but yeah, start with what works for you and then just find a tribe, find someone that you enjoy listening to, and there's usually people with plenty of content out there.

Speaker 1: 35:00

I read a book very recently. We both know the author.

Speaker 2: 35:04

His name is Peter Swayne oh yes, I have it right here he could be proud or rich.

Speaker 1: 35:09

52 life lessons by Peter right there, I've got it here. Shout out to Peter yeah, and that's worth checking out as well. Figures got so much insight. And also, I don't know if the author's still going on, but you get free access to his mastermind.

Speaker 2: 35:29

You do? He actually just had it today at 12. Yeah.

Speaker 1: 35:32

I'm missing it because I've got crazy stuff going on in my life, though so I missed it today too, actually, but that's great. I love the fact you mentioned there, abraham Hicks, because I think spirituality, or the concept of the old concept of spirituality, is somewhat overlooked. But we've got to remember we're just human beings having a spiritual experience or spiritual beings having a human experience.

Speaker 1: 36:02

That's it yeah, one of a friend of mine, david Corbyn, who is internationally known for TED Talks, mentors and the rest of it. He the first time I had him ever speak he opened the talk with we are spiritual beings having a human experience and I was like this is going to be good. Just that first line was so impactful and I'd never heard it before. It may have been saved by someone else, but I hadn't heard up until that point before and it was such a valuable lesson and we were into the failure of all the perceived failure of things.

Speaker 1: 36:51

What lessons have you overcome and perceived failure that have really sparked off a different pathway or avenue on your journey? You know, when you first fail, you hit your nose, it leaves you there. You're like oh crap, but then there's another epiphany from it.

Speaker 2: 37:08

Yeah, perceived failures. I would say I've started three businesses with three different people in a matter of a few years and worked with a non-profit at one point that kind of fell apart all in about three or four years. And I would say thank God in a way, because the lessons that we get out of that, if we can actually sit with that and go, instead of it being bad, like oh it sucked, that was terrible, and not seeing any good in it, we missed the lesson, we missed the whole point of the experience. And I'd say that's the same for personal relationships. It's like how can we say what did I learn from this? What was good about it? What can I do differently next time? How did I show up in this way?

Speaker 2: 37:57

And so for me I would say, yeah, those three businesses one was with Peter, one was with Preston Brown, another plat and one was with someone in Club House, and then I had another non-profit that I don't want to mention the name, but I was involved with them as well and they just things didn't work out. And you know what it was. I'll tell you what it was. I'll be completely transparent. It was me trying to hitch on to someone else's wagon because I was afraid to do what I'm doing right now myself, because I thought who am I? I'm too scared to start it myself. And another person that's a big influencer for me, that's influenced me, is Scott Martin, and he's been on my channel as well, and the others that I've mentioned have too, that I've interviewed them and I tell you it's like he kept saying to me Jill, why don't you just do it yourself? And I'm like, I know, but you know it's like ah Thoughts. And so this is why I say it's taken three years to finally just go okay.

Speaker 1: 38:55

I'm doing it.

Speaker 2: 38:57

And so I tell you it was scary. Who's gonna show up? What if people don't watch it?

Speaker 1: 39:02

Who cares?

Speaker 2: 39:03

And then who cares? But you know what? I love interviewing people, I love being curious, I love bringing out the best in someone. I'm enjoying it so dang much. And, as everyone says, are you making money doing that? I'm like no. But you know, I'm not really wanting to. I mean, I'm not saying I don't wanna monetize it, but I just wanna keep it so pure the people are getting delivery and value that there's not a oh, she's only doing this because then I'm gonna have to pay her for something at the end. I just don't, that's not for this particular thing at this stage right now. That's what I'm feeling. This is how it goes. But yeah, so Scott was really instrumental. So I'd say just those business situations really made a difference. And because I learned something about business at the same time, I learned okay, jill, you know you can do all this yourself, like now, you know you've seen yourself in action. Now go do it.

Speaker 1: 39:51

Yeah, the thing is, I think people are not aware of the struggle that people all entrepreneurs go through with, the self-doubt they make scenarios up in their heads of what if that happens and they actually taught themselves, like you've done for the past three years out of doing something that's in your highest good and including me, I've been through the same journey not gonna do it too, scared, shame, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then it comes to a point where you just think, fuck it, I haven't got anything to lose, but I've got so much to gain.

Speaker 2: 40:32

Yeah, and you know, what's so interesting about that is here's how our earthly bodies, our brains, will mess with us, versus our intuition saying go, do it. You're supposed to do this. You know the calling. If you get a calling from God or from spirit, however you wanna identify and you know there's something you're called to do is we will mess ourselves up. We will tell ourselves oh, I'm sensing that this isn't the right time for me, because I'm feeling a lot of tension right now and I just feel resistant, so it's probably not the right timing. Bullshit.

Speaker 2: 41:04

Sometimes it is check in, meditate, pray, get real clear or say is this my ego? That I'm gonna get Like I wanna start a community for my YouTube channel for people who are watching. I wanna start a community for my YouTube channel where everybody, like you people, can come in and say I wanna learn more from these people that you're interviewing. And I'm like what if I only get like two people sign up, this is gonna be really scary. And then I have you in there and there's no one in there to teach, or there's no one in there for the call, and it's like, oh, but then I could say, oh, but you know what? I've been really tapped in and I just don't feel it's the right time now to do that because, well, I'm just not feeling led yet. Is it fear or is it? I'm not feeling led. It's not God's timing yet. Just check in. I love that. I do that with myself. I'm not on your boat on yourself. Is this ego here, or is this real?

Speaker 1: 41:47

One of the things that I got taught by somebody and I can't remember who it was now was name that persona.

Speaker 2: 41:53

Name that what?

Speaker 1: 41:54

Name that persona. Oh, so I've called mine Jeffrey.

Speaker 2: 41:59

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 42:00

And if I think it's Jeffrey speaking, I will say Jeffrey, shut up, I'm not talking to you. You're not the person I'm talking to. I'm talking to the higher essence or the higher soul, whatever you will call it, and he is spot, and I've just called him a random name.

Speaker 2: 42:20

You can do a name and Jeffrey will shut up. Yeah.

Speaker 1: 42:23

But then it tells the true, the power self, the internal self and the true self. Actually, I've got this and I know what I'm doing, so Jeffrey can take a back seat until I'm ready for you to come forward and we can have a conversation about it later yeah. But it's not. That's the influence of outside people self-doubt, self-worth, shame and all the other crappy emotions that we get fed from other people. For sure, and I'll give you a little. We're gonna start another business.

Speaker 2: 42:57

You just the last three of you didn't work out.

Speaker 1: 42:59

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 43:00

You know? Oh, lots of stories, I think here's the thing is that we do talk to ourselves, and what I've learned recently from Spetlauna Newsome giving her credit for this because she's helped me out, she's been my spiritual mentor in the past year and a half is to be kind and gentle to that inner being, that inner voice, that ego, instead of saying, because I used to say, okay, suck it up, now we're just gonna do this, now you just we're going to the gym, come on, just stop being lazy, come on, let's go. You know, and it's like they don't respond, that's when my rebellious side goes fuck you, I'm not going at all.

Speaker 2: 43:32

You can't probably do that, and so then I've learned to treat it with being delicate. Now, everyone's different in how they wanna do it, but I think when we're talking to ourselves and pushing down that the ego and criticizing it will, as she says, it will go silent, it won't listen and it will not respond.

Speaker 2: 43:50

And until we identify it, and we say give it some kind of voice or presence or acknowledgement, and say, hey, okay, I see you're not wanting to get up. What's going on, are you okay? What do you need right now? And then it's like it sounds weird, but it's a little more advanced stuff. So this may have freaked out some people who are not into this yet, because it took me several years to get to this point. So I'm not saying that this is for everybody yet.

Speaker 2: 44:10

But when I finally realized this, I couldn't just force my way through, as we always learn is like just do it. Discipline. Every day, every day, when there's resistance, I'm like, hey, what the hell's going on? And I don't say it that way. And now I go like, hey, how are you doing? What's happening? What do you need? Oh, I just had a lot less yesterday and I just my mind's overwhelmed right now because I have so much, I did so much, and I just need to sit for a minute. Oh, okay, that's cool, all right, we'll sit for 30 minutes or so and you wanna do it then? Okay, great, you see it. So it's like it's a reframe versus it's like suck it up, let's go. I'm not listening to you right now. We don't have time for that, and I did that for a long time my whole life really is.

Speaker 2: 44:49

I didn't let myself grieve. It's like, okay, we gotta get this funeral done here. Who's doing the obituary here? Who's right in the? Who's getting the food? I was, that was me. Can you imagine? People were coming to the. I'm getting sides off track here, but people were coming to the funeral and showing up and I'm like my politician mode kicked in. It's like, oh, baz, thank you so much for coming. Ed loved you. He always spoke so highly of you. Thank you so much for being here. Yeah, for grieving widow. You know right, whatever Cause, I just shut it. I have the ability to shut it down. We're not. We're not going there right now. Jill, you can't go there until later. Wait till everybody leaves and then you can maybe think about it. Don't think about it right now. We got. We got a production to put on here.

Speaker 1: 45:26

Exactly that. But this is what I mean about the personas of people, because we were, we have so many different personalities that we show up for different people in we do. When we start naming them like Jeffrey, I don't I know where Jeffrey is and I can have a con like you've just mentioned. You can have a conversation with him later.

Speaker 2: 45:48

Yep.

Speaker 1: 45:49

But there's an appropriate time to have that conversation and it isn't when you're trying to make important decisions in your life that could possibly excel your growth or change it completely. Right, you don't need their opinion in that moment, but you can and you've got to have a. You have a responsibility to go back and say now we're having a conversation.

Speaker 2: 46:10

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 46:11

Can we have a conversation to Jeff about them thoughts earlier? What was like you just said, what's really going on, what's at the root of this and understand it, have an inner standing of Jeffrey is going through pain because of what this is and what's happened previously in that experience of that persona. Yes, you start separating and dealing with your healing internally, bit by bit, stepping stones and chunking things down.

Speaker 2: 46:42

Yes, and I think we should go back a bit, because how do we know when that's happening? Because I didn't feel any of that when I was drinking. I didn't know, I just knew that I was feeling, I felt off and I couldn't tell. And so I've gotten to the point where I'm pretty self aware of when I think we talked about this the other day when we were on a call is this feeling of I'm feeling like I woke up, I'm in a great mood and then all of a sudden, out of nowhere, suddenly I feel a little bit weird emotionally, my feelings are something that affected my feelings and suddenly I'm not feeling, not physically, feeling like I feel sick physically or it's more like emotionally, like, oh, suddenly I feel sad or I feel a little bit like judgmental of myself, which has happened and so I stopped. That's when I stopped and go okay, cause I feel a pit in my stomach. That's why I turned my notifications off. You know what I'm doing something is because I'll get a trigger if I see someone's name I haven't talked to and I'm like, oh, that's right, I need to contact my accountant. I just saw that, okay, and then all of a sudden, pit in the stomach, you know, and you're like, okay, I feel it. And then it's like we have to say and that's where we check in when we start to feel those little jabs, it's to be so aware of it and go, like you said, jeffrey, okay, I know we're gonna have to deal with that, but you know what, not right now. Can we just table this for a bit, and I'm gonna come back.

Speaker 2: 47:54

In Landmark forum they say a lot of times cause we're always chatting, we're always meaning making machines, we're always talking to ourselves, and if you don't know that or believe that, you do. And so there's this voice that's always going on, it doesn't stop. You're not crazy. It's just say, oh, you know. It's like oh, jill, you know what? You're talking too much right now. That's an old tape I get and it's like I just go oh, thank you for sharing. And then you just keep going, because we cannot acknowledge those thoughts and those things that pop up. We just have to sometimes keep going through and we just let it pass. Like you said, not right now.

Speaker 1: 48:26

Yeah, the one thing I, one of the main distinctions I had from this conversation is the talk continues talking to ourselves, and the scientific version of that is you have a super conscious, subconscious, and then the conscious and then the in between that, you've got analytic and all the frequency between alpha, beta and all the rest of it, but all of these frequencies are continuously communicating with us. We don't necessarily understand because we're not human, wise, evolved beings. Spiritually, yes, we are, we are part of grace, god, whatever you want to call it, but as a human experience we're not there yet. So the miscommunication happens and we actually believe around bullshit. That's right, and this is a stumbling block of believing the bullshit in that moment but not being able to see the future because it's not been created in the physical yet, can we?

Speaker 2: 49:29

dumb that down for just a second Cause. Here's what happens.

Speaker 1: 49:31

Okay.

Speaker 2: 49:32

So so I go out with it. I go out with a guy right and it's like maybe I went out and he didn't call me and I'm going.

Speaker 2: 49:38

you know the main mind goes oh, you should just call him. And then five minutes later it goes no, no, don't call him what. I got two answers. Which one's right? Our egos F with us. They just they do that. It's normal and you can't count on that, you said I just want to throw that in as a way to show example is that we are not just because we hear it in our mind doesn't mean it's the right thing.

Speaker 1: 50:03

I love the fact your relationship comes up, because this happens a lot between the dynamics of playing Do I call them? Do I not call them? I'm going to look lunatic, I'm going to look needy. Do I look possessive, do I? Then you, all these just can call them.

Speaker 2: 50:20

My best growth has come from being a relationship coach and working on my own personal relationships. I have learned so much about healing and going through this. It's beautiful.

Speaker 1: 50:31

One thing I got taught many years ago is what's the worst thing that can happen? They can say no, but then, equally, you're one step closer to yes, because you've got to get 100 no's before you get that one yes.

Speaker 2: 50:48

Yes, that's right. So say no I hope you can dive in deeper with that is, when we say we get a no, is the pit in my stomach and I go oh, what am I making that no mean? If I get a no, what am I making that mean about me? Let's pick that apart a little bit. What's the worst thing that could happen? What do I think is going to happen and where's that coming from from before? Yeah, that's fine.

Speaker 1: 51:13

I watched it by Mel Gibson. It was a short time through because I'm a YouTube fan as well One of my vices and he said he stopped being afraid of what people think because he's had that much ridicule in his professional career through one through another. They thought, well, actually, what's the worst thing that can happen? They can have an opinion.

Speaker 2: 51:43

That's very elevated. I like that.

Speaker 1: 51:46

I was like that's some cool stuff.

Speaker 2: 51:49

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 51:49

Because it's true. Yeah, people are always going to have an opinion, and not all of the opinions like are you going to be a light for or you're not going to light when you hear them, and that's equally okay.

Speaker 2: 52:04

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 52:06

I always say I'm not here to be liked by everybody, just the few that actually matter to me. When I'm coaching with somebody and I'm sure you're the same you're not their friend. You're there to elevate them and to get them where they want to go. And there's certain ways we do that, certain scenarios, depending on the person, but you're not the god damn friend. You're not supposed to be going out drinking with them, partying with them, getting all their shit together and doing spending so many hats, doing that one person. You're all there to play a role in their life. And I think with people in the coaching industry, you're breaking into this now, are being too friendly with them and they're in that scarcity mode. If I can't be their friend, they're going to leave me.

Speaker 2: 52:55

Oh, wow, wow. That's interesting. I haven't thought of that, I haven't seen that.

Speaker 1: 53:01

I have, and when they're with this, this friendly mode, they're keeping them close because it means they're paying their bills, basically.

Speaker 2: 53:11

I see. So there's almost a transactional experience where there's this neat, neat scarcity mindset. Where they there's this, I have to have some kind of a closer tie so that way they'll feel more dependent upon me.

Speaker 1: 53:26

But this comes about because people are afraid to let go of somebody or something to let them grow.

Speaker 1: 53:34

And if they keep them with them. They're like, well, you know they're here, that's my, that's my income secure. But if you're doing your job as a coach and as a mentor, we'll have you want to define yourself. You should be like, okay, you're done, now Out, you go, this is the right world. Well, I wish you the best of luck. If you refer someone to me. Amazing, here's a bonus for you you could still have a relationship from afar.

Speaker 2: 54:01

Right, that's interesting. That's interesting perspective.

Speaker 1: 54:05

People are not aware of the what if this happens? Or can I possibly allow myself to let go of something in order to see someone flourish in their own life? When you lost your husband, it was a tragic event. However, look at all the good things that have happened and you've accepted them in your life.

Speaker 2: 54:29

Yes, yes, and it could have been me sitting sitting on a beach drinking my ties or something for the rest of my life, or it's as I am, it's highest and best used my real estate background. How can we make the most of this and how can I help other people not go, have to suffer and go through things I had to go through?

Speaker 2: 54:46

And so I created a program a few years ago that I'd really never marketed much, but it's really amazing. It's this idea of just getting through those stages, those things like for me, personal finance. I was so blessed that my husband taught me how to trade back in the day I do my own investing. Now I'm so able to do all of that and teach others how to do it. And then also like relationships, it's just, it's things that I learned along the way where I made mistakes, and then it's like how can you reinvent yourself, how can you get back out there again when you're starting over or you've changed jobs, you've changed a career and that's what I love doing, that's what I absolutely love to do, but it is, it's your right. It's not so much a transactional. Like you know, I'll help my friends and give them advice and they ask me for things, but I'm not charging them for it. Yeah, that's different, those two different things.

Speaker 1: 55:32

But you also have to remember to set your boundaries with other relationships, including your friends, because otherwise your friends will take advantage of you and can escalate.

Speaker 2: 55:41

That's true, that's true, but I guess I'm an overgiver, but I've been accused of that. But at the same time, I think is that at some point we have coaches every one of my coaches that I've ever had I've ended up being friends with them and I'm not currently being coached by them, but I have bought their programs, I've worked, I've done their events and things. So there is I don't know if I completely agree on that, Bas, because I'm thinking about, like, what the value has come out of that is that there's more of a, there's more to relate than just the. I think you can get closer and you can kind of see how someone operates in everyday life and if they're really authentic and they're real, you get to see an application in practical, like a practical real life.

Speaker 1: 56:29

I agree with the point and understand it. I'm going from an elevator point of view where I'm looking at many, not just singular, aspects. I know you have a very broad knowledge and you can identify who's on your side and it really who is not on your side and you can make an informed decision. And it was different. But also it's knowing that you're worth, it's knowing that this is what I'm worth. And you mentioned something earlier you're okay giving all the time, but you're not so good at receiving things.

Speaker 2: 57:07

I'm getting better at that, and I tell you because here's the deal and some people have talked to me about this lately, including you, I think is we are really ripping people off when we don't let them give to us. And we also get to the point where, when we are constantly giving, people know that and they know that they can always count on us. And I've had friends come up to me and ask me hey, can you help me out with this thing? I want to do this. And I realized, oh, I have set that pace, I have taught them how to treat me, and so I'm doing my own work on that right now. And so it's because I've seen other people who are a couple of friends of mine where it's, or people I've been associated with, who you can't even hardly have a conversation with them, and they're already like well, that's going to cost you. And I'm like what the fuck? We're just having coffee, like what the hell.

Speaker 2: 58:05

You know, and it's like there's that. So I don't want to ever be that person, but I do know I had to do more work on that and that's why I think there's some relevance in, like, the idea of creating the community aspect that I want to do because I know I'm bringing so much value and I think it will really serve people that are struggling to find connection with people that are like mine or people that are where they want to be in that top 33%, and it's really I should almost call the top 30% community, because that's really what I'm trying to create.

Speaker 1: 58:33

But that's an aspiration, but it's not just self-centered, it's an aspect that has been eagerly going to be given to so many more people, and that's why it will work, because the universe supports giving but equally will receive you, or receive so much more in so many different ways.

Speaker 2: 58:53

Thank you. Yeah, I think so too.

Speaker 1: 58:55

That's currently under looked in a lot of industries, including coaching, including corporate sector. I don't want to give anything away and some people have you already said that I can do that. That's going to cost you X. Yeah, I think that's a good point. I think that's going to cost you X. Yeah, I think that's a good point. Yeah, yeah, it's interesting Moving forward and looking from where you are now where do you see yourself in a couple of years or five years?

Speaker 2: 59:29

Do you have that vision yet, or are you still encouraging? I do, I do. Argentina is a real passion of mine and they're going through a really difficult time right now. I've been there, I've had a second home there for 13 years and I'm so grateful that country it's it's it welcomed to me with open arms and when my husband died it was there for me, that they were there for me and I just love the people and I have such a passion for helping them and I Would love to have this ability and I and I see it, I saw it in a meditation I just and it's pretty personal but I, I want to make an impact on world leaders. I really want to.

Speaker 2: 1:00:06

When I see division and I see separation between parties and political lines and people that are just looking for reasons to not agree with each other, I just want to. I want to unify. I want to unify. I want to bring people together. I want, I want to see like solidarity, you know just this like like in just peace and I know that sounds so like Pollyanna, but but we're so close sometimes and yet we seem so far, but we're really very close If one person can just say you know what?

Speaker 2: 1:00:37

This is crazy. Why am I going against this? Just because of what? To just wake up and to kind of not wait I don't use that word wake, wake up but to just have an epiphany moment, to kind of say you know what? What would happen if I didn't just automatically disagree with this situation or condemn it and I actually opened up to the possibility that maybe there can be some, you know, like in Argentina right now they're having elections and and there are the parties. They need help. I mean, they all have to come together. This is not a time for partisan politics where they're saying you said this, you said no, they, everybody's got to roll their sleeves up. It doesn't matter what party you're in, they got to figure out what they're going to do.

Speaker 1: 1:01:15

And.

Speaker 2: 1:01:15

I would love to at some point I you asked me the question is somehow to be a part of like making change in the culture in the community, and I really have this, this. I've had this vision for about a year now to have a summit in Argentina where I bring speakers down that, like you, all of us that are that, if we've been so blessed to know so many people and to hear some amazing, you know, had some just so rich with knowledge and to almost do that that five day challenge type thing that Tony does, but just offer something that's free to attend and they can hear speakers and get inspiration, motivation, you know, education, and then they can go to organically go to places like YouTube and find more free content, and then they can choose what they, who they want to work with. Without any, there's no going to be, there's not going to be any, you know, sales pitches or emails or funnels or anything like that. I am so adamant about that, but I just see a huge opportunity there to to make a change. It's not just the politicians, it's the people. I want people to not think about living in scarcity, but living in abundance and seeing what's possible, and to believe it and have personal responsibility, and that is something that I am so dedicated and committed to for Argentina. But I see it on a bigger scale as well.

Speaker 2: 1:02:22

I think that in everyone in the world, we can all be thinking about how can I see the world a little bit differently. You know, every morning I pray. It's God, help me to see this differently, give me a miracle and help me to see. This is Marianne Williamson from her book. Is a return to love. Is how can I? Who do I have agreements with? Who do I need to forgive? What do I have to get over? And help me to see this differently. Show me how I can see it in a different way? And give me a miracle today and surprise me. And since I've been doing that thank you, svitlana Newsom is I have really seen the world in a different way. It's not just about me, it's not just about the people that I know. It's wow. What kind of change can we make in the world if we are just seeing things and loving everyone equally? As? Another prayer I have is God, help me to love and have such an expansive heart that I can love everyone equally, without judgment, and see everyone the same.

Speaker 2: 1:03:15

Like Mother Teresa, she never got tired. No one ever. She never said gosh, you know, baz, have been on the phone a long time. I got you know, I got some shit to do here. I mean, it's just God, somebody's. Oh my God, I'm getting so many texts, I just need my space. She never said that that's the kind of heart I want to have. That's the kind of heart I want to have.

Speaker 1: 1:03:32

Can I make? A promise to you.

Speaker 2: 1:03:34

Yes, I went on a rant there.

Speaker 1: 1:03:36

No, it's good, I love it. I would love to be a part of what you're doing. Thank you, you're a guy, thank you. Anybody can hear this now. I was listening. I'm getting to this to Jill, if you will receive it, because I know she's struggling receiving things. But let's talk privately about what that could look like and get something down as a pre-limb to start launching it somewhere. Start making the phone calls, some of the awkward phone calls saying Hi, would you come here? It's going to be free and you don't get paid. Would you do that for us? Which is going to be spectacular.

Speaker 2: 1:04:18

I there's no reason there. I know there are other countries out there and you've been listening, I know, and we're coming, coming, coming for you all.

Speaker 2: 1:04:25

But, there is no reason why Argentina should not be one of the best countries in the world. They have all the resources. They have an incredible community of their hearts. They were so amazing. They're so resourceful. They're the most resilient people I've ever met in my life. I mean, they get kicked in the teeth every every six months, every day, and they're just like, oh okay, lost that, all right, well, let's just build another one. It's like what? It's incredible. And so I know we're all doing that in our own way in our lives a lot of times. But it's just not looking at it as a defeat. It's like how can I make this even better? Like rising from the ashes. You know that's another thing. Okay, real quick. I love this because it so ties into your to what you're talking. The title of this is when I started working with divorce, some women after my loss and I created my program and I did a webinar. One I only did.

Speaker 2: 1:05:14

One is is that when we come back again, we're not reconditioned models like a, like an inkjet cartridge, like we get a recondition one versus a new one and we're like, well, it's okay, but it's not as good as the new one. We are even better. We're even better when we rise up from the ashes. We are bigger, we are better, we're stronger, we're smarter, we're more charismatic, we're we are more passionate. We can do so many things that we would never have done if we never would have burnt in those ashes in the first place. So it is when you just rise, you're not just rising back up and you're sort of like well, I still got a dirty shirt because I got some ashes on me, but I'm all right, I'm here. No man, you're like even better than you were before. All that should happen Always and don't ever forget that. Don't ever forget that.

Speaker 1: 1:06:03

I love that and I want to end it on that note because that is very, very powerful. I want to thank you, julie. Thank you very much for your time, your love and for showing up in the world the way you do. Thank you for all the listeners, viewers out there. Please like, subscribe, share. This message doesn't need to get out and if you're ever at a miss something to do on YouTube, please check out Jill's channel and all the links are below. Jill, thank you very much once again.

Speaker 2: 1:06:33

Thank you. Thank you, baz, it was such a pleasure. I appreciate you so much.

Speaker 1: 1:06:36

Thank you very much.